I DON'T

I don't understand myself anymore; I've become distant with who I am and what I really stand for lately. The lines between moral and its opposite have blurred, should I or shouldn't I tell someone what to do because of my own beliefs? Or do I let them go?

It has become all too easy to associate with the tragedies and stories of the songs I listen to and I wonder will I ever shutdown and become another sheep in this society in which we belong. Yeah I may have everything I've ever needed but sometimes less is more, it's made me a worse person.

I'm afraid of myself.

I LIKE

Sophie, blunt pencils, coffee, adventures to unknown places, cracking knuckles, singing to myself, Vans, thinking I can skate, taking photos, playing Xbox, listening to passionate music, spending time with best friends, deep philosophical conversations, attempting to answer ultimate questions, sudoku, kissing, good grammar, space and the universe, sober people, stars, the wilderness, foreign films, visual art and the helvetica font.

COUNTING

The minutes until you are home.

I'VE REALISED

That the chaotic and turbulent environment of a hardcore show can often be the most peaceful one. Just as music connects to everyone on their own emotional and spiritual level I feel as though nothing else matters when you're surrounded by like minded people. I mean you may not be able to put a face to a name but the energy is therapeutic, takes me away from everything...

SOMETIMES

There's just nothing you can do.

UNTITLED

Like a fucking bomb ticking my heart races the same,
I'm screaming my lungs out but no one responds to name.
I'm in the middle of the tempest where there is no shore,
I can't be sure what flag I'm waving anymore.

A FIRE IN MY HEART

I can't for the life of me separate myself from this disdain and loathing of the hate of intoxicated people. Every time I hear about it and or witness it, it only makes me sick in the stomach; it creates a fire in my heart. I swear it will be the eventual breakdown of myself but it's something I can't rid my heart of. I can't sit here and watch this society fall into decadence otherwise it will be me falling. I suppose I have to just let it go, put it to the back of my mind and close my eyes. My music seems to be the only release these days...

FALL DOWN, NEVER GET BACK UP AGAIN

"Out where the stones lay like bones by the ocean
Out where the waves crash contempt on the land
Someone was trembling for fear of the tempest
Somebody silently reached for their hand
Said, understand that if you're cold I'll keep you warm
And besides, there's so much beauty in a storm
So come down with me to the shore
And what's more, I adore you
So tell me, what is there to fear
You think some seraph up above is trying to rob us of our love
Because the sky's not clear
My dear, you know there's not
Now listen to the rain upon the rooftop
But the wind picked up

Out where the stones stand up like thrones beside the ocean
Out where the waves make a grave of the sea
The lovers struggled in the middle of the tempest
And water angrily crawled up onto the beach
Said, hold my hand and stay with me
We'll be released
But the tide clung like an anchor to her feet
And though he tried to make the water line recede
It pulled her out into the sea
He could not break apart the waves to bring her safely back in
He watched her hand break through the surface once
Then disappear again
Forever wait inside the sea for my, my dear
I hear you
You speak in every curling wave
And sing in every violent breeze
Someday not far away from here
My dear, I swear I'll see you
And we will hear the seraphs cry
For they will still envy you and I
How they envied you and I"

La Dispute, Somewhere At The Bottom Of The River Between Vega And Altair (2008)

BLACK SHEEP

'I've watched so many run that it makes me feel numb when
I loose a good friend to another pointless trend.
I'm sick of superficial minds clogging the ears of our blind,
blind because they cannot see their own dismal routines.
No matter what is your label, we've got to turn all the tables before its too late.
and before we have the chance to state all the shit that is wrong with this society
in which we belong, where the privileged don't speak.
they're too busy fighting for their green.
This lack of hope has been jammed down my throat to the point
where I only care about impending air.
As I chocked up, all the words came out
and I finally heard all the shit you had been talking about.
You said I wouldn't last too long. well you're wrong.
I am the black sheep of this country because I won't buy what they sell me.
My friend, that's what this X means.
It's the symbol of all my beliefs.
It's the ink thats been used by this world to cross out my words
so they wouldn't hold and to crush my defiant thoughts.
but its only put a fire in my heart.
I can pick myself up when I'm down with this fire in my heart.'

The Effort, Iconoclasm (2008)

Routine

The sun floods through the blinds,
one singular thought on everyone's minds.
Different routines but the same cause,
sometimes it gets so hectic you just want to hit pause.
In go the headphones to block the world's sound,
the calm before the storm is what I've found.